My story

I know the value of getting the right kind of support when you need it most. I have tussled with tangled relationships, struggled to decide whether to stay or leave, and made a number of scary moves into the unknown.

As a young woman I supported myself working as a mathematics teacher and head of year whilst bringing up my children as a single parent. I was both sorely tested and overjoyed by parenting. I lost things, some of them very precious to me. In 2004, my son Sam took his own life—an experience that profoundly shaped my understanding of grief, trauma, and how to live life well. At times, simply putting one foot in front of the other was overwhelming and lonely, and I needed some help.

What I learned from my own therapy

I gained much from my own therapy. I felt so relieved just to be listened to and to feel that someone else really seemed to 'get' how things were for me. Just as importantly, I learned to understand myself better. I started to be able to accept myself as the particular and imperfect person that I am. I learned how to live peacefully with my past.

One of the most important learnings for me was that the strategies I was using to meet my own needs—such as the need for affection or for support—were not working well for me. I have learned to be more aware of what my needs are and to take responsibility for them rather than wishing and hoping that someone else would do that for me. I am more resilient, more able to meet my own needs, and more willing to do things my way.

How I work with clients

My clients are ordinary people who have had, or are currently having, challenging and sometimes devastating experiences. They want to feel better in and about themselves and happier in their relationships.

It can feel as if the world or the people in it, or even the past, needs to change in order for us to be OK. As we work together, they begin to realise that this is not the case—that we can be OK without other people changing and without the world shifting on its axis. We can sort it out together, from the inside.

Clients can expect gentle, direct, clear communication from me. I listen with great care. I say what I see, what I notice about their ways of being in the world. I support them to understand how they, from their earliest experience, have already created brilliant strategies for life that they use every day to be as OK as possible, and that they can develop new strategies now.

I don't stay silent, nodding caringly and not saying anything. However, I don't tell you what to do—I don't know what you should do. I work with you as myself and I use ordinary language to share my thoughts and responses to you. My clients have described me as warm, kind and patient, as capable and inexhaustible. People have said they feel safe with me, that when I am in the room, no matter what is happening, all will be well. I have the capacity to be with others' deep suffering and pain. I won't shy away from it.

I am direct with people, real—I don't hide behind a façade. The intention to be kind is key to the way I am. I don't try to change my clients. I allow them to be who they are, help them to understand and accept their quirks and differences, to begin to accept and express their own needs, and to develop new, more resilient and joyful ways of living. They begin to trust that it's all right to be the person they are, to have the preferences that they have, and to take up the exact space in the world that they do. They can begin to do their lives differently.

My background and qualifications

I was a teacher and leader in education until 2006, working as a mathematics teacher and head of year. I qualified as a counsellor and gained a degree in psychology during my first career as an educator. After leaving teaching, I worked as a freelance teacher trainer doing workshops on topics related to special educational needs, classroom behaviour, and mental health problems.

I completed my training as a psychotherapist in 2012. Since then, I have worked with individuals in private practice and for NHS services as a psychotherapist. I have experience facilitating groups of students on counselling certificate courses and can offer support to those who are engaged with the process of training in counselling.

I read everything I can lay my hands on and I love to learn. I have been engaged with a wide range of disciplines, including computer programming (a long time ago—when programmes were fed in on punch cards) and sex education. I have made mistakes along the way, had many challenges in my life, and many, many moments of joy.

Neurodivergence and my memoir

I identify as both neurodivergent and gifted (sometimes termed 'twice-exceptional' or 2E). Whilst not diagnosed with ADHD, since I only came to this understanding in later life, I have traits that point to being an ADHDer, and my giftedness manifests in various ways. These differences are simply part of who I am—influencing how I think, create, and engage with the world around me.

I'm in the final stages of writing a memoir about how our education system failed Sam, my gifted and neurodivergent son. It examines the damage when institutions cannot meet the needs of children whose minds work differently. Sam's story reveals missed opportunities—by me, by teachers, by the system—to show him there was nothing wrong with him. It's about transforming how we understand education and truly meeting every child's needs.

Ready to explore working together?

If you'd like to find out more, please click here to book a free 20-minute introductory meeting at a time that works for you.